I don’t know about anybody else but today I am feeling the spirits of the 2,993 people that died in the September 11 attacks and I feel so unbearably sad.
I was not in New York City on the day of the attack. I was sitting on the couch with my two year old and I was seven months pregnant. Brevitt was asking me about the fire, the planes crashing, the falling bodies. I was too shocked to turn the footage off immediately and I was sobbing. How does one explain hatred and death to a two year old?
Today I stopped in to my children’s Charter school, the Aspen Community School. Every Friday the principal, Jim Gilchrist, holds an All School Meeting with all the students and I was needing to feel connection to humanity so I stayed to observe.
Jim asked the students to reveal ways that one may achieve excellence in life. The children, who are in grades K-8, were happy to participate and were very intelligent in their answers. They knew that if one wants to achieve excellence one needs to work hard for it by practicing every day, listening, being patient, enduring frustration and never losing that devotion to their passion.
At the end of the meeting Jim sat down in front of the older children and spoke to them of the attack. Instead of speaking of violence, hatred and terrorism he focused on the hundreds of firemen and bystanders who rushed in to help save people’s lives. He spoke of helping one another and being there for each other. The children absorbed what he had to say with open minds and hearts.
There are many different people in this world and we all practice different religions, philosophies and ideals as well as politics but it is only a small percentage of people who live their life through hatred, envy and jealousy.
If only all children could be taught to not hate or resent others for being different. I have watched my children be filled with anxiety and fear for things that they do not understand. I encourage them to research the topic and soon they may not feel so threatened by their fear. I try to teach them that hatred brings anxiety, illness and war but love brings peace, tranquility, harmony and friendships.
I myself often get pissed off at humanity and feel like running away from my loved ones. Instead, I take a wickedly deep breath into my lungs and breathe out the worst profanities. I breathe in again and this time I feel calmer and as I breathe out the profanities are not as strong. Sometimes it takes many breaths and often the anger can seep back in but I try not to give the disturbing thoughts air time. I don’t want to be filled with hatred, it will make me ugly and I always want to be beautiful.
If only people would look inwards more and try to analyze the roots of their anger. What if they were born differently and were the people that they felt resentment toward? Would they want others to judge them for their race, creed or color?
Their have been so many musicians that have magnificently captured my sentiments such as Bono in the song “One”, John Lennon in “Give Peace a Chance” and Michael Franti in “I love you” but it is Ben Harper that sings “Better Way” with such passion that every time I hear it I cry because I too believe in a better way and want the world to WAKE THE HELL UP.
What if we could all laugh more, love more and live more lightly? What if we all realized that listening to opposing views could make us more interesting? I’m thinking that most of my reader’s already live this life but what about the others? How do we convince them that life is about dancing and loving rather than killing and hatred? If we combine our efforts and practice love and an open mind on a daily basis is it possible that we can achieve excellence? Tell me, cuz I really need to know.
One, two, one, two, three
I’m a living sunset
Lightning in my bones
Push me to the edge
But my will is stone
‘Cause I believe in a better way!
Fools will be fools
And wise will be wise
But i will look this world
Straight in the eyes
I believe in a better way!
I believe in a better way!
What good is a man
Who won’t take a stand
What good is a cynic
With no better plan
I believe in a better way!
I believe in a better way!
Reality is sharp
It cuts at me like a knife
Everyone i know
Is in the fight of their life
I believe in a better way!
Take your face out of your hands
And clear your eyes
You have a right to your dreams
And don’t be denied
I believe in a better way!
I believe in a better way!
I believe in a better way!
Wow! Great writing! I really enjoyed reading what you had to say about wishing for a better world!
What a moving post, and surely a moving day for all of us who were aware of what was happening. I like what you’re trying to do for your kids, and love starts first within ourselves, and then our homes. From there, we can reach further and further out until we’ve touched all of humanity.
Thank you for raising very aware children. You’re doing all of us a service.
Love and peace to every living being today, and always.
Oh Jillian (((hugs)))) I feel your pain and I sure know (and scream) the “wake the hell up” feeling. I don’t have any answers. I try to believe that if we set good examples, live lives of integrity, truth and JOY, others will join in. I know. I’m a cockeyed optimist but I don’t know how else to be. Fighting isn’t the answer to anything.
9-11 was tough. My best friends daughter was on the Pentagon plane – it was devastating. My husband knew people in the towers. My son raced home from college to join the frikin Army!
You talk about a mixed up bag of emotions. It took me years to stop crying, being angry, being scared, being depressed – I would alternate emotions – crazy! I think the approach that the teacher took with emphasizing the heroism of that day was just awesome!
And honey, I don’t know how in the world you tell kids about the way of the world today, I really don’t. It makes the whole concept of we are ONE seem like a fairy tale laced with b.s.! You are doing a fine job with those boys – just love them and hug them while they are still in arms reach.
Of all frikin days – this is my husbands birthday! So we are going out to dinner to “celebrate” and I am SO not in the mood. Probably didn’t do a damn thing to cheer YOU up either! Sorry about that. I’m having a quieter version of meltdown too.
It occurs to me that you are already doing everything a person can do to make this world a better place. Because the best we can do is to start with ourselves and to raise our children (by example) to love and not hate. And, clearly, you are doing that.
Thank you Darrelyn. I agree, we must teach our children by example.
Suzen,
You are so right that we must live our lives with integrity, truth and joy. Maybe by blogging our intentions we can spread the word faster and stronger.
We can only be optimistic or failure and despair will prevail.
I wish you a wonderful evening with your husband on his birthday. It would be way to coincidental if you were also a Taurus like me, you’re not are you?
Your words could never depress me. You always cheer me up and make me smile. We are kindred spirits you and I!
Jillian, such heartfelt writing! I love that you stuck around and bonded with the kids and Jim during All School Meeting. Amazing things happen at those meetings, and I am so happy to read about it here. I really understand what you mean about taking those deep breaths and working out that anger, too. Really rich stuff here!
Hello Elizabeth,
We are lucky to have such an incredible school to teach our children how to love, thrive, create, act and be confident!
Thanks for sharing that. I clearly remember 9-11, too. I live on Long Island, so it was very close to home for us. I am a teacher and there were several students who had friends or family who worked in NYC. A few sad stories among our group – but thankfully, many miraculous ones, too. That was my first year teaching, too. I’ll never forget.
Thanks for caring. The world needs more people like that.
Happy SITS Saturday Sharefest.
I am a very empathetic person, too. I often put myself into other peoples’ shoes and wonder if I would walk so well.
People have always been judged for only their race, creed, class, sexuality, etc. by shallow and narrow-minded individuals. I don’t really know if this will ever change on a global level. Setting a good example for our children is the best course of action, in my opinion. I know it’s cliche, but they really are our future. Instilling tolerance and having open communication with them is such a simple thing. If enough parents did this I can imagine we’d see a change.
One can always hope, right?
Some schools are afraid to talk about the attacks..good on your school for going forward
xx
Thank you for your meltdown.
I know exactly how you feel. I have been feeling the same way lately with all the hate and despair around us. People need to stop and remember how we came together on that awful, tragic day to help each other.
I wrote a similar 9/11 post, but yours was far better.
http://deniseisrundmt.com/2009/09/11/one-nation-under-god-indivisible/
Wow! Just…Wow! Great post! As a former paramedic who worked Hell’s Kitchen and South Jamaica, Qns, I’ve seen what hate can do.
I couldn’t write the other day. I couldn’t even read your post. I love your blog. You are so clear. I was in New York that day and will never forget a single second, from the time I left my apartment and walked into the most beautiful September day I can remember to seeing the buildings collapse and hearing President Bush say it was a terrorist attack. There isn’t enough space here to catalog my experience but there was love in the midst of terror. As we rushed to leave our building at 4 Times Square before the second tower went down, we all sought people who didn’t live in the city and clung to them, brought them to our homes, huddled together. I’ve never felt more oneness than I did walking up Fifth Avenue with all the other silent mourners looking forward and around and up at the sky. We all just kept moving, watching the tickers, looking downtown. My goal was to reach Central Park. I felt like then I would be safe. I was with a co-worker who lived on Long Island and was scheduled to be married that Friday. Everything was so confusing. We were so disoriented. Things dawned on you gradually, but it seemed like they dawned on everyone at the same time. People suddenly thought I better go to the ATM and withdraw as much cash as I can, and everyone did. I somehow always managed to be one of the last people to get things before they ran out, lucky. I remember my dad, who works in defense, telling me to leave the building immediately when I finally reached him. It was forever before I could reach anyone in my family again because all the cell phones were jammed. People were locked in the city together and they stuck together and then they turned to their leader and hung and clung to his every word. Rudy Guiliani is the last trusted politician. He was truly a leader. We needed him and he was there, telling the truth, telling the awful truth in the exact right tone and then in the long hours, days and weeks to come, he told us what to do and we did it. I remember that in my boyfriends apartment on the 42nd floor on 79th and 2nd, I could see, smell and taste the smoke and the wreckage. We lost friends. I saw humanity. I saw human ache and pain in every picture of “missing” loved ones hanging on every in of free space in the city. For more than I year I walked by a memorial to a firefighter named Rubin that his neice hand drew and taped to the fire station on W. 83rd. I walked past it on my way to and from the gym every day. And, every day I saw it. I felt it. I can still see it. I can still feel it. My poor dad thought he might have sent me to my doom when he told me to leave the building. About ten minutes after I did the second tower fell. But, I was 40 blocks north. It was so confusing for everyone. I remember just waiting for Guiliani to talk, like he was god. I also remember seeing everyone. I still do. To this day, I look around and say these might be the last people I see. I look into their lives. I also live with the knowledge that every time you say goodbye, even if your just going to work or the grocery store it could be really be good bye. It’s not morbid. It just makes me appreciate every second I have with the people I love. It didn’t end that day. There was the small pox threat and anthrax and bomb threats to buildings. I would hold my breath in the subway and again look around to really see all the people I was with.
But to your point of understanding, I remember saying that the image of the wreckage, the sharp, twisted metal, the mountain of debris, the smoldering stench was what was inside the people that did it. They were that hurt and angry. I felt sorry that that was in them. You cannot teach people who have miserable lives to purge that. All you can do is try to give people hope and vision for there own prosperous future. In some parts of the world that is impossible. Greg Mortgenson, Three Cups of Tea, is doing that building schools in Pakistan with money raised through private donations. No government money is accepted because if it was, the people of Pakistan wouldn’t trust Greg’s motives. His only agenda is to make the lives of the children and their families better through building these schools. And, he is, because what he is giving them is a vision for their futures and minds of their own.
The other thing I can’t forget was the gift that Holland gave New York, millions of bulbs. My last memory tied to September 11th was 7 months later. I was in a cab on my way to LaGuardia and as we turned onto Central Park West and drove along the park flooded with daffodils, all I could think was, thank you.
Wow, I love that he taught it from the perspective of all the people who helped and that’s how we do it. Brilliant message, and it’s definitely not one that I’ve heard before. I’ll have to keep that in mind when the wee ones get to the age where they start having remembrances there and are old enough — maybe next year even for Mister Man.
Such an awful day indeed.
Have a great week. ?
Elizabeth this is a remarkable testament to mankind and I am honored that you wrote it on my blog.
How profound you are in likening “the wreckage, the sharp, twisted metal, the mountain of debris, the smoldering stench” to the terrorists themselves.
Thank you for your descriptive memory which helps us to never forget.
I firmly believe that we can only benefit by communicating the importance of acceptance to our children.
Thank you Darrelyn!
Namaste
I think what you wrote in the comments –
“I firmly believe that we can only benefit by communicating the importance of acceptance to our children.” – is what is needed to see the most change. I’m starting to get an itch to try and spread the word of acceptance through neighborhood children, my kids’ acquaintances, my cousins, my friends’ kids….it’s only through the children of tomorrow with things start to feel like they’re changing for us “today”. Different = interesting in my home. I only wish that were the case everywhere.